Awaken The Dreamers.

Good evening everyone. I had a terrific weekend. Not that any of you really care but if you do I'm going to tell you about it, if you don't then you can kindly get the fuck off of my blog. Well anyway, Friday was uneventful. Saturday is where my weekend really began. I went over to Emily's house and chilled out for a bit and ate some cheese cauliflower soup. It was delicious. We then went to a show/birthday party. We had a great time there. Made some new friends and got to see a few bands. On our way back from the show I got a gigantic bean burrito from Sheetz. It was beyond delicious. When we got back to Emily's we pretty much passed out. Emily's mom took pictures of me when I was sleeping. It's not nearly as creepy as it sounds. I guess my septum ring got hooked on the blanket while I was sleeping and Emily's mom had to unhook me. Over all it was in interesting night. Then the next day Emily and I watched Star Wars Episode One. She barely paid attention to the movie but that's alright in my opinion it's the worst movie in the series. After that we just hung out all day. Emily plucked my eyebrows. She did a good job because now I don't look like I'm part gorilla. Later on that night I called my mom for a ride home and she didn't feel like coming to get me so I stayed at Emily's another night and walked to work in the morning. This morning was probably the best morning I have had in a while. Getting woken up by a hug and a kiss is much better than an alarm. Then Emily and I ate some cereal. I didn't want to eat but I knew Emily would want me to so I did anyway. After that came the worst part of my past 3 days. Having to say goodbye to Emily. It's always so difficult but we manage to do it all the time. After that I walked to work. Work was surprisingly not that bad. My normally silent co-worker was rather talkative today. You would be surprised how much a little conversation can brighten up your day. All we talked about is how other people we work with suck. Which is alright with me because most of them do suck. When I thought my day was mostly over my boss comes out and asked me to work till 5. That makes one 10 hour day this week. Tomorrow I'm going in early so that chalks up 2, 10 hour days. This coming paycheck is going to be super bad ass. Maybe I'll buy myself a new TV. I'm thinking a 40 inch LCD would be nice. I need to start Christmas shopping too. I don't think I'm going to go overboard with my family this year. Probably something small for each of them. I'm going to buy Emily a few things though. And I'm going to buy myself some stuff too. I don't buy much stuff but when I do it's usually one hell of a indulgence. My next large purchase should be a car. I have a bunch picked out but getting anyone to look at them with me is like fucking brain surgery. Oh well I'll get one eventually I guess. I should get to bed now that I only have 3 hours of sleep until my impending 10 hours of work crashes upon me like a speeding train.

No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white, just our hands clasped so tight waiting for the hint of a spark.

Hello everyone. Sorry for my recent hiatus from blogging. I have just been drained from work lately. I have been working 10 hour days for the past few days. It gets to you more than you would think. Today now that it is the 18th is a very special day. Today makes it exactly 5 months since Emily and I started dating. I can honestly say that the past 5 months have been the best of my life and it just keeps getting better. I have never felt the way I feel now being with Emily. I hope it lasts forever. Every day just gets better and better. I think the best part is that every time I see her I still get that nervous feeling I got that cold night in the back of my mom's van when I asked Emily out. It's like she takes all the parts of my life that are unstable or that I am unsure about and supports them and reassures me just by her being there. She takes all the pieces of my life that are fragmented and scattered about and puts them all back together. I love her with all of my heart. I almost feel like this is a dream because I didn't think love like this really happened in real life. And Emily I know you are reading this, I love you more than I previously thought was humanly possible. I can't live without you and I hope you feel the same way. Baby cakes, you are my everything and I hope it's always that way. I wish I had more to say but my mind is just a mess right now. I wish I could express how I felt better. I feel like I have problems getting my thoughts through to other people. It's especially hard explaining feelings that I have never had before. I guess there is a first time for everything right?

Collect Some Stars to Shine for you.

Greetings readers. Today was a good day. Work was easy and painless I got an awesome breakfast sandwich, and got to leave half an hour earlier than usual. After work came the highlight of my day. Spending the rest of it with my baby. Even if today was a shitty day at work just seeing her would make it all go away. Even if I just caught a glimpse of her walking down the street from a passing car. All of my dissapointment, my anger, frustration and stress are gone. They just disappear like they were never there. The feeling I get when I'm with her is just indescribeable. I can't get enough of it. I know Emily is all I blog about really but the truth is I write about what's on my mind and she is constantly on my mind. Which is good because I never want her to leave. I just love her so much that it's hard to out into words. I have never been at a lack of words in my life and she is the one thing that dries up my proverbial ink well of words. Every time she looks at me and smiles it's like I fall in love with her all over again..... I love you baby cakes.

Contused Patella.

Greetings blog readers. I was just looking at my stats for my blog and was shocked to see how many international views I have. So I would like to make a shout out to all my homies in the far parts of the world. I would love to travel to all the places where people have viewed my blog. The thing I love about travel is all the different culture. Just seeing the small things that people do differently all around the world is interesting to me. Even as close as Canada is I would love to go there just to see how things are different. Like I heard that in Canada milk isn't sold in a jug it's sold in a bag. How awesome is that? It's little shit like that, that gets me. Speaking of little things, I was talking to Emily on the phone earlier tonight and we started talking about the little tings that we do that we find cute about each other. I told her that I love the face she makes when she laughs. I could be so sad and depressed and see that cute little squinty eye thing she does and I would instantly be better. I could go on for days about how much she means to me and the tiny little things she does that are cute. I love her so much. It seems like I am falling more and more in love with her every day. I will be perfectly content if I never stop falling. I don't have much else to say so I guess I will cut his one short tonight. I love you baby cakes!

Quick Stop.

Hello everyone. This is the second blog from my phone. Well third if you count the one I spent an hour meticulously tapping out and then completely lost because of some bullshit app. In fear of losing all of this blog I am going to keep things short and to the point. Today was a good day. Work went by fast and was actually mildly enjoyable compared to most days which are usually equivalent to being slowly crushed under a rock. After work Emily and I walked around looking for job applications. She only got one and it was from a video rental place. If she gets that job I will be totally jealous. I love movies. I just think that amount of work and coordination it takes for so many people to make a movie is astonishing. Someday I would like to be part of the movie making business. It's a stretch I know but I can always dream right? I hate how unsure I am about any of my future career options. It seems like everyone else has everything figured out and I'm just left in the dust working shit jobs. Oh well I guess I could always work at a video store.

Hello...

Hello everyone. This is my first blog from my phone. I had a hell of a time finding a decent blogger app but finally I found one that seems to work. It takes a while to type this out on my phone but my computer is being shitty tonight. Plus I need to get better at typing on my phone. Anyway I had a good weekend. On Friday I went to the football game. I really have no interest in local high school football. I only go because Emily is in the marching band. It was ridiculously cold out that night and the seats were wet. Luckily I got a poncho to sit on. Two annoying girls always seem to sit behind me whenever I go to a game. Every time they open their mouths I get closer and closer to turning around and flipping shit on them. It sounds like I bitch a lot about things at the football games but the truth is that I would endure it all just to see Emily. After the game I went to her house and stayed the night. We stayed up late and watched movies with her mom all night. I love doing things like that. The only thing that can make a movie night better is a movie night with Emily. The next morning Emily's mom made a huge breakfast. It was delicious. A while after that I got a text from my mom saying that she would be in the area and asking if I wanted a ride home. I didn't want to go but my parents get pissy when they have to go out of their way to pick me up. So I decided to go home. After I got home something snapped. My mood just turned and I felt terrible. I think it was set off by having to leave Emily. A lot of things have been on my mind lately and it has just been building and building. I was a mess to say the least. Luckily Emily was there for me to talk to. She called me and we talked on the phone for a bit but some people showed up at her house so she had to go. Fortunately I could keep texting her. We had the deepest conversation that I have ever had with anyone. She was there for me and that's all I could ever ask for in a person. She was getting tired so she went to bed. I didn't sleep much that night and the little sleep I got was still and dreamless as usuall. I woke up the next morning at about six am. I felt like I haven't slept for days. Emily texted me about an hour later and we continued our conversation from the night before. Then we spent the rest of the day talking to eachother. I have never felt so close to her. I feel closer to her than I do to my parents. I feel like she is the only person who completely understands me. I can't explain how she makes me feel. Without her I would truly be lost. After being so close to her all day I had to say goodnight which was difficult. I didn't want to stop talking to her and the more I think about it the more I miss laying beside her. I just can't wait until I hear from her or see her again. It's like everything is in black and white when I'm not with her and when we are together everything is so bright and vibrant. I can't wait until everyday is colorfull. Emily I love you with all my heart and don't you ever forget it baby cakes.

I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming.

Good evening readers. I have been in an odd mood lately. I don't know why but for some reason I feel it has something to do with my last blog post. It's hard to explain. I don't have much to talk about tonight so I decided to give you a walk through of the day I had today. It starts off with me awakening from my alarm clock on my new phone. It wasn't nearly as loud as I would have hoped it would be but I still have some settings I can mess with. I roll out of bed and get dressed in my usual work attire, a stained white t-shirt grease stained jeans my beanie and my brown hoodie. I could either be considered extremely fashionable or a bum. I tend to feel like more of a bum in my work clothes. After getting dressed I got a drink of water which I can not drink to fast because it is hard for me to breathe in the morning and I feel like I am suffocating when I drink a glass of water. I then messed with my phone for a few minutes as I waited for my dad to get up and get ready to leave. The car ride was average for me and my dad, no spoken words except "see ya" when I get out. After I arrived at work and messed with my phone and texted Emily while I waited for 7:00 AM to roll around. Once it was 7 I walked out into the shop asking everyone what they knew about the move we were scheduled to do today. Everyone said that it was an 11,000 load, which if you know nothing about moving is a decent amount. Everyone bitched about how much bullshit moves are as we gathered up mattress bags and pads to put into the rented uhaul truck. Then we stood around and bitched about moving some more until it was time to go. I rode with Billy as I usually do because Billy and I are now the only 2 people at work who don't smoke, and Billy is really the only person I can really stand to be around for extended periods of time. The move was only a few miles away which was unfortunate because I like long car rides. After arriving at the destination we exit our respective vehicles and congregate around the garage door of the house and speak with the elderly man who is the resident of this humble abode in which we will be emptying of all their worldly possessions. He clears up the few questions we have and we promptly get to unloading the house and loading up the trucks. We started with boxes and small soft things. There was a bag of stuffed animals in the one bedroom which I picked up and started to carry out. On my way out I saw a teddy bear sitting on the couch next to the husband of the couple we were moving. I politely asked if it was being moved and the older man replied with a yes. So i picked it up and started walking out to the truck. As I was walking away I heard the husband let out a sad sounding "bye". For some reason that made me really sad. Call me emotional I don't care. After that the rest of the move is a blur. Just picking up heavy articles of furniture and sitting them in a truck. We finished loading at about 11:30 and got back to the shop at about 11:45. When we got back I started stitching boxes together by hand with a pneumatic staple gun. I normally don't mind stitching but today I was just in no mood to stitch at all. Luckily for me I did it for the rest of the day non stop. After work was over I walked to Emily's house. This was by far the best part of my day. It's like my entire day consists of me being underwater and when I look up from my phone and see her walking towards me on the sidewalk it's a breath of fresh air. We hugged and kissed and walked back to her house as she told me we had to walk into town to get some things for her mom. After we got to her house I asked how her cat Junior was doing because he has been sick. Emily her mom and I talked about that for a while. Then we started talking about ringtones on our cellphones when Emily's mom's friend Cody got back from getting cigarettes. Cody said he was thirsty so Emily's mom volunteered her to make Kool-Aid for him. I was messing with the GPS feature on my phone and walked out into the kitchen to show Emily that my phone said I was sitting in the middle of the river. Emily then poured Cody a glass of bright blue Kool-Aid and offered me one also. After drinking my beverage I told Emily that my mom was coming at 5 to get me so we better go to the store now. We said bye to everyone and started walking down the street hand in hand. As we were walking past this one house a lady emerges from her front door in a full out conversation. I didn't see anyone else around so I thought she was talking to herself but Emily explained to me that her husband isn't around a lot so she talks to her cats. I told her that I thought that was sad. We continued walking saying that we were hungry the whole time. When we got to the store we wondered around looking for things we could eat on the way back. I decided on 2 chocolate eclairs and a small container of macaroni salad. Emily picked up the few things her mom needed and we paid for our items and left the store. As we were walking through the parking lot I opened the eclairs and gave one to Emily. She said she has never had an eclair before. I told her they were French. Once we got to about the end of the grocery store parking lot someone beeped so I turned around and looked acting like I was drunk. After that I started to stumble around slurring my words and Emily told me I was going to get picked up for being drunk in public. I finished my eclair and threw the container that it came in onto a pile of garbage in front of a dumpster and started eating my macaroni salad. We walked back to Emily's house and when we were about to get onto her street my phone rang and it was my sister. She was freaking out because I wasn't at Emily's house when they went there to pick me up. I told her where I was and was about to cross the busy street when Emily yelled at me and told me to wait for a car to pass. As I was hanging up the phone Emily was starting to run across the street. She didn't see a white van speeding towards her at about 45 miles an hour and ran out in front of it. I didn't have time to even yell at her to stop. As I saw the van swerve and miss her by less than a foot my heart skipped a beat. We then walked across the street and my mom came and picked us up and gave us a ride back to Emily's house. I kissed her goodbye and explained her near death experience with my mom and my sister. My heart was still racing and I was still in a state of minor panic. I talked to my mom and sister about my mom's friends and which ones I don't like. When I arrived at home I sat around for about 15 minutes and texted Emily. I then decided to get a shower so I turned on the internet radio on my phone and proceeded to get in the shower. After that I went to my room and messed with my phone and texted Emily until I fell asleep. I was awoken by a phone call from Emily. I am glad she called because I wouldn't be able to sleep tonight if she didn't call me. After texting her for a bit more I started writing in my blog. And now I am here. I don't know what else to say so I guess I will put up an acoustic version of one of my favroite KoRn songs. I love you Emily.

Does this make me not a man?

Hello everyone. I recieved my phone today. It is so bad ass. I can't quit messing with it. But anyways to my main focus for post tonight, music. I am kind of ripping off my girlfriends idea in her blog but it was interesting and I like it. Oh and if you didn't come from her blog already you should check it out its www.izzysmiles.blogspot.com.

 

The first band is Between the Buried and Me. They are a technical metal band. I first discoverd them when looking for covers of classic rock songs. After listening to a few songs and liking them I promptly forgot about them for about a year or so. Then my friend Nathan showed them to me again. That time they stuck with me. I have been listening to them ever since. 

 

The next band is Pantera. I got into this band in about 9th grade. I don't remember exactly how. But after hearing a few songs I became obsessed. I listened to them constantly. This band and their guitarist was what made me want to start playing guitar. This band truly got me into playing music. They are not all that technical like the music I am into now is but I still enjoy throwing in a Pantera CD in every once and a while. I can honestly say that this band changed my life by inspiring me to pick up the guitar.

 

The Red Hot Chili Peppers is the next band on the list. My mom got me into this band when I was young. I remember her singing the song Pea in the car and then telling me not to tell my dad that she let me listen to it. Since then I have always liked them. All their songs are good and I could listen to them for hours on end. They are so unique and even their old music is so fresh sounding to me. I will forever be a fan.

 

This band if you don't recognize them is Metallica. This picture is circa 1991 which happens to be the year I was born and the year I first heard Metallica. My dad used to play their music all the time when I was younger. I have listened to Metallica literally all my life. They used to lull me off to sleep when I was an infant and some days they still do. This band was also part of the reason why I started playing guitar.

KoRn is a very important band to me. I first heard them on MTV when I was in 7th grade. I was watching music videos when one of their songs came on. It was Alone I Break from their album Untouchables. From that one single song I was hooked. After that I watched MTV every day in hopes of hearing just a part of one of their songs. I remember one day my dad walked in the room when they were on TV and he asked if I liked them. I quickly said no because I knew he would judge me for it. Not only is this band extremely unique but they are very meaningful. Most of their songs are about the struggles of the lead singer Jonathan Davis. I can identify with many of the experiences he has been put through. Their music has helped me through some tough times in my life. In particular the very first song I ever heard from them. Little did I know on the sunny afternoon sitting in front of my TV in my living room home alone mesmerized by Jonathan Davis killing off the other members of the band that years later that song would help me in ways I couldn't imagine. Out of all these bands this one has helped me the most. I will always be in debt to KoRn.

That's about all I can think of tonight for bands. I should really get some sleep...... or play with my phone. I think I'll play with my phone. Oh and Emily I love you baby cakes!

And crawling, on the planet's face, some insects, called the human race. Lost in time, and lost in space... and meaning

Hello everyone. Sorry for the lack of posting yesterday. I was beat from trick or treating with Emily and her friend Cheyenne and my little brother Eli. It was fun even though we only got to go for like a half an hour because my parents just disregard my perfectly orchestrated plans. I got a few good pieces of candy but I doubt I will be eating any of it because I am seriously considering becoming vegan. I think I will start weening myself off of milk and egg products in the next 2 months and make it a new years resolution. I already quit smoking and I can't think of much else to quit so I am thinking this will be a good direction to go. If you didn't know I have a thing for dropping bad habits like.... well bad habits I guess. About 2 years ago I quit drinking pop. If you don't know what pop is let me explain. In northwestern Pennsylvania "pop" is a carbonated soft-drink such as Coke, Pepsi, Mt. Dew, ect. I have had a sip every now and again but most were accidental and I haven't had a full pop in 22 months 23 hours and 42 minutes. Then the next year I went vegetarian. It wasn't as nearly as hard as not drinking pop which really surprised me. I have been on a vegetarian diet for exactly 10 months 23 hours and 42 minutes. I started not eating meat just for the sheer challenge but eventually the health and animal rights benefits came into light and I realized how much I love being a vegetarian. Being a vegetarian has really changed me in a good way. Meat honestly disgusts me now. Just the smell of it turns my stomach. Milk and eggs are starting to get the same way with me. Not only has a different diet changed my appetite it changed how I think about the meat industry. It is violence and shouldn't be tolerated. I'm not going to preach on about it because it never made an impact on me until I did some research myself. But anyways back to my reoccurring blog topic, I ordered my phone : the Droid X. It should be here Wednesday. I'm excited. I don't feel like going with a overall theme for the post tonight so I'm just going to keep it random and sporadic. I had a busy weekend last weekend. Friday I tried to go to a zombie walk with Emily Cheyenne and my sister Kaitlyn but once again my Mother disregarded my plans and did what she wanted so we got there when it was over. After that we hung around ,still dressed up as zombies mind you , until about 8. Then we went to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Awesome movie by the way. If you ever have the chance to go see it in a theater definitely do it. After the movie I went back to Em's house and stayed the night. The next day we went to a show and saw a few local bands. I was overall impressed with all the performances that night. Especially Power they were great. Then I went home and went to bed because I had a splitting headache. I wish I would have stayed at Emily's again. But I talked with her on the phone all night anyway. The next day I went trick or treating. All in all it was a good weekend only because I got to spend so much time with Emily. I love her more and more every day. I'm glad I am so comfortable around her. I have never had a girlfriend that I felt like that around. I wish I could just pack up my stuff and move away with her now, but unfortunately we have to wait until she graduates. I could wait forever for her. I'm out of things to say so I guess I'll call it a night. And Emily I love you baby cakes, try not to blush to much when you read this.