No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white, just our hands clasped so tight waiting for the hint of a spark.

Hello everyone. Sorry for my recent hiatus from blogging. I have just been drained from work lately. I have been working 10 hour days for the past few days. It gets to you more than you would think. Today now that it is the 18th is a very special day. Today makes it exactly 5 months since Emily and I started dating. I can honestly say that the past 5 months have been the best of my life and it just keeps getting better. I have never felt the way I feel now being with Emily. I hope it lasts forever. Every day just gets better and better. I think the best part is that every time I see her I still get that nervous feeling I got that cold night in the back of my mom's van when I asked Emily out. It's like she takes all the parts of my life that are unstable or that I am unsure about and supports them and reassures me just by her being there. She takes all the pieces of my life that are fragmented and scattered about and puts them all back together. I love her with all of my heart. I almost feel like this is a dream because I didn't think love like this really happened in real life. And Emily I know you are reading this, I love you more than I previously thought was humanly possible. I can't live without you and I hope you feel the same way. Baby cakes, you are my everything and I hope it's always that way. I wish I had more to say but my mind is just a mess right now. I wish I could express how I felt better. I feel like I have problems getting my thoughts through to other people. It's especially hard explaining feelings that I have never had before. I guess there is a first time for everything right?